Today was the last Kazba of summer 2008. Something I've thought about over the last couple weeks is how to say good bye. When I was younger, like in high school, I was all about the hella sentimental good byes. I was generally really effected when each intern no longer was employed by the Jeremiah Center and they were no longer a major part of my everyday life. When I was younger I really struggled with these individuals who, seemingly effortlessly, could detach from a community that they had invested themselves into for three months. I was so influenced by there presence at the JC I assumed they would need some dramatic send off.
What I've learned is that unfortunetly it is much easier for a college student to say good bye. We've had to so many times. At 18 years of age I had to say good bye to everyone whom I loved and cared about and I uprooted my entire life and moved to an unfamiliar place. I was a lucky college student because I only moved an hour and a half away. College students are currently moving and saying good bye. It becomes such a way of life. For those readers out there who I go to college with, remember after Freshmen year how big of a deal moving back home was. We were all so unsettled by the fact we were leaving the communities we had been apart of for 9 months, but by the time Sophomore year came around, we were like "Whatever, I'll see ya in a couple months." We have become numb to the pain of leaving our established communities, (or maybe we have become more realistic about it not being that big of a deal). So past college student interns aren't huge ass holes who only pretended to love the kids they served, they have just had a lot of practice. We've had to say good bye to so many different communities in our short lifes, that saying good bye one more time is a part of the ruitine. It's a little different for me, because I am not really leaving. I am going to continue to volunteer at the Kazba while I reside in Olympia. My fellow intern Eric doesn't have that oppertunity, he lives in minnesota during the school year. He can't come back as easily as I can.
How do I make it clear that I have learned so much and experianced so many great things during my internship. How do I make it clear that I have had a life changing summer and I will never forget the amazing people who make up the patrons and staff of the Jeremiah Center. I don't know how to make that clear.
When Chris and Gina moved I had a similar experience. When I found out they were moving to Kentucky I didn't know how to react. They were both a huge part of my life and have influenced who I am today. I wasn't angry (like some). I just didn't know how to react. After I finally talked to them, I thought about making them something or doing some sort of good bye present, and well everything I thought of just seemed so trivial. "Hey you are really important to who I am today and now your leaving so I thought I would give you something to symbolize how important you are to me, so here is a picture I drew!" Everything seemed insignifcant and almost offensive to their memory.
I want people to know I am going to miss them and that they are important. I just have to say that so often these days, its starting to wear on me. I guess I should (and need to) look at this predictament as a great thing. Not everyone gets the oppertunity to have such different and diverse communities to love and to identitfy with.
I just wish Edmonds and Olympia weren't so damn far away.
I am thinking about starting a new blog. I mean, still being a loyal blog poster here on "I never knew a revolutionary who was afraid to dance" But also commiting to another. I am really good at over commiting myself, so my not. I want to start a Blog about Faith and God and all the things I think about and wrestle with in regards to this extremely important part of my life. Alot of this includes that, and it will continue to because this blog is about my life and well Jesus is apart of my life. I haven't decided yet if I want to do it. Daniel thinks I should call it my "God Blog."
I'll keep brainstorming a name!
Thursday, August 21, 2008
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