Thursday, August 28, 2008

Why aren't you in Denver?

How long can I avoid cleaning out my desk?

I'm going to Olympia this weekend. I haven't been there in a long time. I don't think I have gone this long without stepping foot in Olympia since my first day of school. It isn't that I haven't wanted to go at all this summer, mostly it was due to a total lack of time. I haven't even gone camping this summer (except for work). It will be interesting to take a short break from this place. I think it will put things in perspective. I am really excited to be in Olympia for the weekend, I feel like a huge part of who I am resides in the boundaries of Oly and I need to reconnect with that.

So, when I am in Olympia my late night heart can only go to one establishment, and that is the Reef. But unfortunately when I am in Edmonds I can not go to the Reef, and the options are limited. There is no cool, independently owned alternative for me to enjoy late night coffee. Really my only two options are Shari's and Denny's. I really think both have there ups and downs, but for some reason everyone in Edmonds much prefers going to Sharis, like its classy or something, so I haven't been to Denny's too much this summer. Toward the end of the school year after a camping trip, a few of us ate at Denny's and saw (a somewhat pathetic) attempt to cater to a younger, hipper crowd. I saw the first attempts at a late night menu, which included food like Potachos (which are nachos with potato chips). But you know, I gave them cred for trying. The advertising for this late night Denny's look was also kind of laughable. The slogan was "Nothing exciting happens after midnight, except Denny's" and the color scheme was very youthful and edgy. Well anyways, the thoughts of late night Denny's and Potachos had pretty much escaped me, when I ran across some interesting article on the internet. Denny's has a new Rockstar Menu which includes dishes that were designed by different bands. And not only were they inspired by mediocre pop punk bands whose fan base is made up 13 year old girls who read teen bop, but the menu items are referred to as Taking Back Bacon Burger Fries (Taking Back Sunday), Plain White shake (Plain White T's), and the All American SOS (The All American Rejects). I thought Denny's had used all of its pun creativity when naming "Moons over my Hammy". And that isn't even the bulk of all the edgy changes Denny's is making. They are playing "cool" music at the night time, and the waiters are going to be wearing jeans and t shirts.

Denny's is hella PR
I think my mom is right, we are in end times.

So apparently my mom is the new hard hitting political investigator. She works at the QFC in Edmonds and Maria Cantwell came into the store yesterday, which isn't a big deal, she shops there all the time. Well anyways my mom and Maria were talking, like they do often because they have a somewhat familiar relationship. Anyways as my mom was recounting this story to me tells me that she asks Maria Cantwell "So why aren't you in Denver?" Maria answers "I was, I got in today, I just prefer to watch it on TV." My mom asks the hard questions. Her words, not mine.

Friday, August 22, 2008

No seriously its this big...

Today that huge ass fish was caught using that barbie brand fishing rod.

That cat fish is record breaking.

Have any of you caught a fish this big?

I didn't think so Matt Louv.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

"So here is a picture I drew!"

Today was the last Kazba of summer 2008. Something I've thought about over the last couple weeks is how to say good bye. When I was younger, like in high school, I was all about the hella sentimental good byes. I was generally really effected when each intern no longer was employed by the Jeremiah Center and they were no longer a major part of my everyday life. When I was younger I really struggled with these individuals who, seemingly effortlessly, could detach from a community that they had invested themselves into for three months. I was so influenced by there presence at the JC I assumed they would need some dramatic send off.

What I've learned is that unfortunetly it is much easier for a college student to say good bye. We've had to so many times. At 18 years of age I had to say good bye to everyone whom I loved and cared about and I uprooted my entire life and moved to an unfamiliar place. I was a lucky college student because I only moved an hour and a half away. College students are currently moving and saying good bye. It becomes such a way of life. For those readers out there who I go to college with, remember after Freshmen year how big of a deal moving back home was. We were all so unsettled by the fact we were leaving the communities we had been apart of for 9 months, but by the time Sophomore year came around, we were like "Whatever, I'll see ya in a couple months." We have become numb to the pain of leaving our established communities, (or maybe we have become more realistic about it not being that big of a deal). So past college student interns aren't huge ass holes who only pretended to love the kids they served, they have just had a lot of practice. We've had to say good bye to so many different communities in our short lifes, that saying good bye one more time is a part of the ruitine. It's a little different for me, because I am not really leaving. I am going to continue to volunteer at the Kazba while I reside in Olympia. My fellow intern Eric doesn't have that oppertunity, he lives in minnesota during the school year. He can't come back as easily as I can.

How do I make it clear that I have learned so much and experianced so many great things during my internship. How do I make it clear that I have had a life changing summer and I will never forget the amazing people who make up the patrons and staff of the Jeremiah Center. I don't know how to make that clear.

When Chris and Gina moved I had a similar experience. When I found out they were moving to Kentucky I didn't know how to react. They were both a huge part of my life and have influenced who I am today. I wasn't angry (like some). I just didn't know how to react. After I finally talked to them, I thought about making them something or doing some sort of good bye present, and well everything I thought of just seemed so trivial. "Hey you are really important to who I am today and now your leaving so I thought I would give you something to symbolize how important you are to me, so here is a picture I drew!" Everything seemed insignifcant and almost offensive to their memory.

I want people to know I am going to miss them and that they are important. I just have to say that so often these days, its starting to wear on me. I guess I should (and need to) look at this predictament as a great thing. Not everyone gets the oppertunity to have such different and diverse communities to love and to identitfy with.

I just wish Edmonds and Olympia weren't so damn far away.

I am thinking about starting a new blog. I mean, still being a loyal blog poster here on "I never knew a revolutionary who was afraid to dance" But also commiting to another. I am really good at over commiting myself, so my not. I want to start a Blog about Faith and God and all the things I think about and wrestle with in regards to this extremely important part of my life. Alot of this includes that, and it will continue to because this blog is about my life and well Jesus is apart of my life. I haven't decided yet if I want to do it. Daniel thinks I should call it my "God Blog."

I'll keep brainstorming a name!

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Remain in Limbo


This is a word I've been using recently to describe my life. I am sure every college student can use this word. That is just part of the whole college experience. Lets look over some numbers, just so we can see just how damn temporary my life has been.

I moved to the Evergreen State College, into room A418
I became an RA and moved into B building
I moved home for the summer into the house on 220th
We got evicted, I moved into an apartment with my mommy
I moved back to school, C building
I got fired from that RA job and moved into an apartment with Nathan
(I won't even count the time I spent without home)
I moved in with my sister for the summer
we got evicted, I moved in with my mom
In a month I m moving back to Olympia

In the last two years I have lived in 8 places, it will be 9 here real soon. I have also had four different jobs. My life has been unpredictable to say the least.

It's hard investing into situations that are temporary. Why decorate your room when your only living somewhere for 8 weeks? I have really struggled with how to deal with the temporary. A simple answer (which I have greatly considered) is cutting out one of the two pulling forces in my life. I am constantly living in this limbo between Olympia and Edmonds. I cannot completely invest in one until I can let go of the other. When I was at school I thought that after this summer I would never come back to Edmonds long term. I would stake permenant residency in Olympia. During internship I greatly considered not returning to school and continuing to invest in this community. What I have come to realize is that I am not ready to let go of either community. I need to finish school and I am so excited about the people I will be in community with next year at school, I also can not deny a community that has made me who I am today. The Jeremiah Center is a community I love and cannot live without.

What does this mean?______________________
__________________________More temporary.

Last week at Salt and Light: Sunday Night we studied the passage that basically says; do not store up treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and thieves break in and steal. But store up your treasures in Heaven where moth and rust do not detroy and where theives do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is your heart will be also. As usual I didn't prepare a ton for this bible study. But as I was leading I had one of those Aha! moments that are so revered. Treasures on earth are destroyed by moths and rust and get stolen by thieves. Treasures on earth are easily taken away. Treasures on earth are temporary. This constant struggle with being temporary will continue to make me question my call and rediscover where God wants me to be. If my treasures are not temporary, than my heart will also not be temporary. Maybe I can love two communities that are a hundred miles apart.

How can I make lasting treasures, treasures that are stored in Heaven. I need to invest in the lasting. I need to stake my identity in the acountable. I need to give my heart to the permenant. I have been blessed with two, very different, communities. I want to love and serve them both.

I need to remain in Limbo__________________
______________________for at least a little bit longer.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

All they need is a shower and I could move in...

My life has been the Jeremiah Center for the last two months. This statement is not made out of spite or disappointment. If anything it is said out of joy! but nonetheless, I live and breath the Jeremiah Center. I know that in a few short weeks I am not going to be able to live and breath JC anymore. I am going to move to Olympia, go to school full time, and work part time, so I will obviously be preoccupied. I still plan on remaining invested in this community when I can. I just realized how weird it is going to be not to be at the JC all the time. I can probably count the days on one hand this entire summer that I haven't either been at the Jeremiah Center or somewhere else with a group from the Jeremiah Center on a trip.

I don't know if I am ready to be done.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

I'm gonna lose... MY FREAKING MIND!

I got punked.

I walk into my office today and in the middle of the coffee table is a plate of Jello, and in the middle was the Harry Potter action figure I keep on my desk.

Next to it was a note saying "Jim tried playing a joke on you. He failed!
-Dwight aka Chris 3000

I am still not sure who the culprit was.
I can obviously expect Chris due the the incriminating note, but I have reason to believe it was someone else.

Never the less, it was the best way to start the work day ever.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

While learning life is strange and people change and circle round again

I saw Pinneapple Express 4 hours ago. It was definitely a weird midnight showing, it seemed as though everyone was drunk or high who was at the theatre. People were laughing at all the wrong jokes. Whenever there was a blatant marijuana reference or someone got hit in the balls, everyone would be rolling with laughter, but whenever the characters where engaging in awkard, Apatow-esque banter, the crowd remained silent. I felt as though the movie was funny and enjoyable, but definitely didn't blow me away. As my friend Eric mentioned, whenever they was an empty moment they just added immature physical humor. "Blah haha ha, he just got hit in the head with something blunt!!" It followed a similar pattern as Super Bad, two friends are forced to realize how much they mean to each other through an epic journey, and at one point the friends are seperated and one of them must make the decision to put themselves on the line to help there platonic soul mates. The relationship between Seth Rogan's character and his girlfriend is pretty funny in this film because all in all it meant nothing, which I appreciated.

No stunning previews before the movie :(
The Dark Knight was better.

Today was rather drama filled. Luckilty I was generally removed from the specific things that went down, but none the less, it put a damper on my day. Imagine a world were everyone could be completely honst about their feelings and straight forard about their intentions. So much of being a human is using all aspects of who we are to manipulate the people around us. Why do subtlies tell our stories? I want to shout my story! Oh, and for anyone interested. Some may view the way in which I interact with the people in my life as fake or an attempt to fulfill my duties as an intern, and to some extent I do believe you need to set stricter boundaries for young people than adults, but let it be known that I act different because I am a changed person. Obviously I've grown and matured in my two years of college, and I can look back at my behavior as a high school student and reflect on the negativety. As I live and work in the Christian community associated with the Jeremiah Center, I hope to model a way of life, that through experiance, I believe glorify God. It is evident I am far from perfection and I never want to give the impression that I am without lust, selfishness, bitterness, and sin, but I will only encourage healthy lifestyles in this community. I would hope that a Christian community could be drenched with accountability and honesty, and I hope that as I fuck up (because I will) my community holds me to my actions. I don't slam down the iron fist because I'm an intern, I do it because I hold the Jeremiah Center community to a high standard that reflects God's love.

SLT retreat is this weekend and I am excited to see the future leaders of the Parish. I hope to love them and grow along side them (as much as possible from Olympia). But I am sure not going to lower my standards and expetations.

Be the leaders you are capable of being!!
The leaders God created you to be!!


Saturday, August 2, 2008

Angel, won't you call me?

Hair cuts and high fives.

I played frisbee late last night with a light up disk. It was pretty amazing. It made me reminiscent of poor attempts at playing badminton in the dark. I had a glow in the dark frisbee, it really didn't work very well.

Daniel got me the Decemberists 5 songs EP, I am digging it.

apologies for hella emo blog posts. We all just need to whine sometimes!